Smoke Show

 

I should’ve known,

Known when you stopped reading what I wrote,

You were no longer interested in understanding,

You were reading to know me,

You were reading to fuel your narrative,

So you stopped.

Stopped hearing me.

Stopped needing me. 

Stopped knowing me. 

I thought you’d be the one. 

The one to want to hear my insides.

The one to want to feed my heart.

Instead I learned,

I’m worth tearing down,

Feeling ugly,

Not hearing,

All smoke show here.

No one staying,

No one caring.

And I’m still here with someone who 

doesn’t even know me. 

Can’t say why I’m angry,

Doesn’t know why I’m sad,

I thought you were the person most similar to me,

But I’ve never felt so far apart from someone. 

I thought we’d end up at an alter.

I thought you knew my heart,

The desire to be understood,

Something I can’t shake.

Wanting someone to listen,

To hear,

To love