I Hope You Know How Badly You Were Wanted

 

You were what my literal dreams are made of. 

Cosmic stardust and magic insides.

You were hoped and prayed for.

Your presence was a constant cause of happiness.

I hope I made you feel loved in late night conversations. 

I’m sorry you couldn’t stay. 

I hope the sky is beautiful where you are.

My family is falling apart without you.

I don’t know how to not blame my body.

My very being.

Just know, none of the things that have happened are your fault.

You’re perfect and kind. 

I hope you live on every time I look up.

What’s Neil de Grasse Tyson Say About This?

 

Why do we always get the timing wrong? 

Why are you always Jeckell and Hyde?

Are we simply not meant to be? 

Is there someone out there better suited for us? 

Is there no one better and we still just won’t be good enough?

Every time I think I could have a good life. 

I always end up here. 

Confused by you. 

Confused by the universe. 

Confused by what this is supposed to be.

Will you think your next future is better than me?

Will you treat her better?

Will you ever think about me?

Will you ever think we had fun?

Will you ever think about the life you were building before?

Those dreams and thoughts and desires?

Will you bury them like I’ll have to bury you?

Will you tell me how nice my husband is?

Will you mean it?

Will we sit in the car during drop off?

Will we ever change for someone?

Will you want her more than you wanted me?

No boring there with her. 

Will you always diminish the hurt?

Will you say hey to the other kids?

Will you ever be sad to see that you weren’t the one to give me the pregnancy of my dreams?

Where kindness and faithfulness reign supreme. 

Will you place blame?

Will you make up with her for hurtful words?

Will you buy her flowers?

Will she excite you more?

Make your heart stop?

Imagine her in a wedding dress?

Cherish her?

Will you think she was meant to be?