Hey shug,
I know I haven't wrote to you in a while, but honestly, I just haven't had anything to say. I do think you are the only other person I know who has such a knack for self-destruction. So this is kinda to be expected. I don't know why we do it either. Sometimes I just want to run away and start over. Every time I pour my heart out to someone and they just sit there. Every time they say just the bare minimum to keep me around. Every time they leave me blatantly hurting. My heart closes just a little more. And eventually, one day it won't open at all. But who the hell would even notice. How is it possible that I just continually end up in one-sided love affairs where the only person who doesn't get off scot free, is me? Then I remember if I ran, I would just spend my days crying because I missed that dang baby. So I stay. Stay, looking for the kind of love I have never received in return. Hoping against all hope that will somehow be the one person destined to give a fuck about me. And nothing ever changes, the people might look like they get better and better on paper, but damn, do they all hurt the same. And everyone does it. All of them. No matter how much I love them, they just ignore all the words on words on words I spew out and say a whole bunch of nothing in return. Is this the cruelty of my life? Was I an awful person in another world? I just hope you're doing a hell of a lot better than me.
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